Sunday, January 06, 2008

clearing the air

so, on to my emotional spring cleaning. i went back to church today. for the first time in, well, months. and it was good. i hope i can keep it up. i really missed the feeling of being there. (despite the awkwardness i always feel while sharing the peace-where to turn?!? who to shake hands with next?!?)

with that part down, i just need to take control of my insecurities in my relationship. it's not any tangible thing; just me being an idiot & worrying about what could happen, losing s. if anything, i think things are even more amazing between us, but this is all such uncharted territory for me that it scares me sometimes. a lot. and yet, he's still here, telling me he loves me, even when i'm being a complete & total idiot. especially when i'm an unrelenting moron. i guess that should be a sign. i'm such a lucky girl.

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3 Comments:

At 1/7/08, 11:09 PM, Blogger SUEB0B said...

They should make you count off in ones and twos. Then they could say "Ones share the peace to the left, twos to the right, then switch."

I crack my stupid self up.

 
At 1/8/08, 3:29 PM, Blogger Suzanne said...

Just thinking about that kind of relationship makes me smile.

 
At 1/9/08, 5:46 PM, Blogger ann-marie said...

i've never been comfortable with sharing the peace, either.

and i went through the same irrational fears with d after we'd gotten serious. just enjoy it -- nay, revel in it -- and love him back. :)

 

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