Thursday, August 30, 2007

today's word is... protean

according to merriam-webster:
protean • \PROH-tee-un\ • adjective
1 : of or resembling Proteus in having a varied nature or ability to assume different forms
*2 : displaying great diversity or variety : versatile

my emotions are feeling rather protean at the moment. even if that is an inappropriate use of the word.
lately, for the past year, my dad has been sick and after much fruitless testing at home, my parents are currently at mayo for more rigorous testing. the latest guess, from my emt brother, is that it's multiple sclerosis. all the symptoms fit, unfortunately.
i don't even know what to think of it if that turns out to be what he has. at this point, i'd just be happy for a diagnosis. i know i was relieved when i was diagnosed in 1999 with my medical condition after nearly 5 months of hiding my symptoms and hoping they'd go away. never really happens with chronic conditions; they only seem to get more bothersome when ignored.
with an incurable disease *cue the scary music here* at the least you can usually get some sort of maintenance drugs or treatment. who knows? it may not be ms and could turn out to be something completely benign and simple. i've definitely got my fingers crossed.

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Saturday, August 04, 2007

to s: one year

today is one year since we met. i spent much of the day with your extended family, celebrating your parents' 35th anniversary. stress, but not nearly so much as at the first few (months of) meetings. and your grandma is still adorable, possibly as a result of missing mine, but she sure is cute.
hopefully your family likes me. i know mine like you, even though you've never met face-to-face. perhaps before the year is over.
i mostly want to say thank you for letting me be me. there are very few people in this wide world with whom i feel comfortable enough to really be myself. i'd very much like to continue that.

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